I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
The dick lei will go down in squad history