Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
