i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
