She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Randomize
