omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
