i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Randomize
