i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Randomize