so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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