dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
