dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
