i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
