Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
