I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
They have beer where we have blood.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
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