that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
