ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
