Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Randomize
