he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize