I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
