Can Purell be used as lube?
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
