my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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