Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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