I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize
