Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
