Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
