it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I have feelings that need drinking.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
