Im at strip club and am horny
hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Randomize
