The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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