Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
