I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
