it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Randomize
