is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
