Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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