You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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