You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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