butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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