Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
please come you make the beer taste better
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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