Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Randomize
