trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
