Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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