I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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