I'm really into asian looking animals
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Randomize
