YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same