i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
