We're like a lot better than the average bears
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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