I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize