u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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