I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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