You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Is it because I queefed?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Randomize
