My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
