just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
