How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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