We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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